i can just feel it
i can not explain how much every muscle in my body hurts from this weekend... good times, good times!
plans for a trip to the UK in August are slowly solidifying. maybe ending up in Paris for a weekend... it looks as though most of the New Years Resolutions are going to be fulfilled. seeing Jim and Rickesh before they leave @U.S. in June... getting a passport and using it... 2005 is off to a very good start. its going to be an amazing year, i can just feel it.
Sunday After
friday became a true test of my patience. after work, round two of grocery shopping, picking up donations and finishing cleaning my house, i was exhausted and didn't want to move, much less drive an hour to pick up 4 trainees that i'd never met before. you know how it feels when something's supposed to be the best time of your life and then something happens on day one that sets the tone for the entire "something"? i was pretty sure that the events that went down on friday were going to be the theme of the weekend... little did i know.
between meeting the "egyo famous Scott" and having on board the 4 British trainees, this Ice Fishing was quite possibly better than last (in my book). i have an ungodly krick in my neck... i'm not sure if its from the snow football or from sleeping on a couch that's barely big enough for two people to sit and on a hardwood floor sans pillow. snow football left me with a bruise on my face and some on my arms and.. (i'm dubbing a new word) .. snowburn from way too many facewashes and tackles landing face first in the snow. to end the time at the cabin, round 4..or was it 5?.. of "hour of power" started at 10AM sunday morn. only after the mystery of the broken tapper was solved. the tap didn't pour the beer, but we townies will NEVER leave beer at the bottom of a keg if we can help it... and oh, how we helped it. between tilting the keg at the perfect angle, someone catching the beer as it flowed out the holes on the side of the keg and putting just the right amount of pressure on the "tap spot", it took three of us to drain some. and then someone dropped the pitcher, and we started the fiascal again. pictures will be soon to come.
you are now officially allowed to be pissed at yourself if you weren't there. and if you were.. Thanks So Much!
the circus begins
today is the day... WELCOME TO THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF ICE FISHING IN TOWNIEVILLE USA!!
2am was when i finally called it quits last night. that was after making a gallon + of barbecue, cleaning my bathroom with a toothbrush, 2 loads of laundry and putting a VERY HUGE dent in the mess that has been engulfing my room since i "moved in" in June. the true chaos begins at 1pm, after i clock out.
CHECK!
eric proofing... check
testing swampwater... check
grocery shopping for "100-200 international trivia delegates"... almost check
ice fishing starts in t minus 20 hours. looks like its going to be an all-night cleaning session. never really thought that i'd pull an all-nighter cleaning. and why the hell am i cleaning?.. for 20+ people to come and crash? what am i thinking? oh blah di... life goes on.
had "fargo prof" today. she said "OOFTA". if any person not from northern/central wisconsin or minnesota can correctly define the meaning of this word, you will win a ... very special prize.
things to do: clean house, make 10# of ground beef into barbecue, somehow clear my concious of the past two weeks that i've lied to local business owners, yada yada...the list goes on.
happy ice fishing y'all!
eric proofing
i got my pictures back from wsc today. pictures always make me happy no matter what, but there's something extra special about all those haram pictures you tend to not remember happening until you stare at them for a really long time. i will get them put onto something and link them to my blog in the near future, but for right now (its 9 pm), holly, kait, and a few others .. me included, are all going to holly's cabin (an hour away) to "ERIC PROOF" and test the swampwater out.... because it is OZ DAY! and we all need to SUCK IT DOWN!
fixed
two hours, $70, a little w-d-40, some electricity and a jimmy-rigged hood pop,.... my car is fixed! (for those of you who weren't able to sleep because you knew my car was broken...sleep easy tonight!)
tow, pop and jump
my life lately has been one crazy thing after another. this is already causing minor deposits of stress...
i was put in charge of the recruitment marketing for this semester, which is great because marketing is what i'm longing to do for a large portion of my life. however, the ungodly amount of time it took me to find, and download the posters yesterday, and then continue to search for the different sayings to put on them was rather annoying. but once i did, the posters turned out looking amazing!
while i was looking for poster stuff, one of my friends called to let me know that my headlights were still on. i didn't believe him because #1: there are many cars that look like mine around campus and he had no clue where he saw it, and #2: i specifically remember thinking about turning on my lights that morning but opting against it because turning on lights = loud squeeling which = embarassment that i don't have enough money to fix it which = just plain bad.
walked out to my car last night... its D-E-D dead. "pop the hood and jump it" some may say... and to that i laugh. oh, i could jump it alright...in fact i'm a master jumper (got cables in the trunk and all), but those people didn't read about how i broke the release cord for my hood pop over a week ago...and back to that poor thing, i didn't have enough money to fix it.
just waiting for the tow company to call me back now... i need a tow, pop and jump. sounds more like a dance really. the next "aiesec dance" perhaps?
and just to put another kick in... as i tried posting this 5 minutes ago, the page expired and everthing got erased.. round 2, lets hope this works
pouvre
i'm poor...go figure, a college student being poor. i've decided to start the "holly diet". popcorn and water. mom always sends microwave popcorn home with me, the dollar store sells boxes of like 5 packs, and an already popped box of popcorn on campus is $.25... that's like a whole day's worth of food. i may incorporate some cereal in that too as i still have the box of honey bunches of oats that i was carrying around at WSC.. i've rationed that well. and water's free, so this will be a cheap diet..woohoo.
question: i left some noodle-roni type stuff out overnight by accident. is this still good to eat?.. will the freezer kill any potential food-poisoning bacteria?
hot tubbing in winter
one thing that i love about winter is snow. if it weren't cold and a driving hazard, i'd want it to stay around all year long. after fresh snowfall, my roommate and i like to go outside in the middle of the night while everyone sleeps... we make snow angels in our front yard and write "believe". its fun watching people and their confusion turning into joy when they see what's happened to their yard.
unfortunately, with the lovely snow comes coldness... but as i was thinking while large clumps of delicate snow flakes fell the other day, i realized how snow equals warmness. i, as well as others, find something quite soothing about snow and the temperatures... comfort that if its snowing out, it means that its between the temps of 10 and 32 degrees outside. this results in and extreme jump for joy as every inch of skin is not required to be covered to go outside... that walking out to your car in flip flops to retreive something and go back inside will not result in your feet looking like burbs' last winter.
saturday night was like a trip back home. holly, kait, shady, and i went to lisa's house (our sugar mama). ended up at a townie bar.. which became my theme for the weekend (will touch on the other bar later). the simplicity of townies is amazing.. walking around in a camoflage hat, flannel shirt and rubber boots phases NO ONE. a few beers, a live band a la Sweet Home Alabama, and a few dirty jokes from a very townie old man and we were headed back to lisa's. slipping into our swim suits, holly mixed cosmos and we headed outside in -10 weather in bare feet to get to the hot tub. i've never been hot tubbing outdoors in the winter before, but its very interesting having your martini glass forever frosted and half of your hair hanging as ice cicles. after some good heart to heart conversations, 5 more martinis in 2 hours, and frying bacon at 4am this was quite possibly one of the best nights i've had in a long while.
as for the other townie bar i made my presence known at this weekend.. friday, after a rough hang-over and 6 hours at work, i headed home, slipped into PJs and thought about cleaning for the ice fishing weekend.. a phone call came just minutes after i changed... "come to the depot, we're drinking already". i'm a hard sell, let me tell you. put sweats on and headed to the bar..located on the train tracks and plays second home to the most small town people i've seen since i was last home. one of the girls i was with ran out of cigarettes and instead of walking across the street through the blizzard that was taking place outside, she hit on the most disgusting man i've ever seen...if the lights were a little brighter i think we may have seen creatures running through his greasy black hair and extremely non-white teeth. ended up with a pack of smokes, two drinks for her and a round for the rest of us... sad part of this story is that because of our hang-over beauty and high-class sweats, we fit right in.
there's a part of me that thinks that "you can take the girl out of the honkey tonk, but you can't take the honkey tonk out of the girl" may be the theme song of my life... and i don't necessarily think that's bad. i think that everyone needs to remember their roots and embrace them. sometimes its embarassing, but there's nothing like knowing the names of every single person at the bar you happen to stop into... or having sliding contests through water filled ditches.
oddly enough
trying to recoup from last night.. and am thinking very strongly about doing it again tonight and tomorrow. an alieve and mucho water should do the trick.
i'm the kind of person who doesn't really have a strong grip on the news these days. there are a few reasons. #1, because i don't have time, and #2 because i find it more objective and enjoyable if i have conversations..or read certain people such as Alfredo's blogs.. to learn about stuff going on. don't get me wrong, i know that stuff is happening.. knew the president was sworn in yesterday, knew a tsunami hit, that we're at war with iraq et al. however, i love to read about the stupidity of people in the world... i think it just makes me feel better about myself. for example, today, the hookers in Antwerp have requested that the city dim its street lights because they aren't satisfied with the appearance it give off of them AND its driving business away... the city will discuss this matter sometime next week. oh, and the guy that robbed a porn shop in Milan. he got away with an inflatable dummy and some dominatrix clothing for it. he'll be hard to spot running down the street.
hope that makes your day, 'cuz, damn, stupid people sure make mine.
all hail the queen
i reclaim the crown! i was doing so well, not walking into anything, getting anything caught in anything else, curbing the amount of biffing. but tonight, i reclaimed the title Queen of Clutz... (i gave it to myself). what do you think of when you hear "minnesota" ..? cold? snow? fish? ICE? i know all these things are present in my every day, but somehow, as i was walking in heals out of one of the buildings on campus... futzing with my purse, i succeeded in slipping on some ice and falling down half a flight of stairs before catching the railing and pulling myself together. and to those who were watching?. i politely warned them about the ice on the stairs
boobs, bars and donchaknow
classes started again today... yippee chi-o ty-a. one upside, the only class i have on tuesday-thursday is a "no book, no tests, do it yourself" WooHoo! the prof, though is the epidemy of the movie
fargo. watched that the other day and came to conclude that if i was from north dakota, i'd be utterly insulted that they called it
fargo instead of
brainerd. because only the opening scene happened in ND. anyway, this woman,... i couldn't understand a word she was saying.. not because i don't understand "up north" language, but simply because her "donchaknow" and "bAg" and "tOOOdAy" type words were worse than anyone i've EVER met... and i live here. please, someone tell me that my accent isn't as bad as those on that movie...someone...please?
after a long day of classes (i've only attended one), of course the whole university is about to head downtown to get completely plowed because tonight is DRINK SPECIALS!!
i've always been kind of curious about this. don't get me wrong, i like a good alcoholic beverage just like the next guy, but why is it only then that we feel we can truely let our inhabitions go and guards drop? i sometimes wish that the world would be a much simpler place if we could simply read the minds of others. no one would ever question what anyone thought of them and thus resolve many problems between human beings. because i think that most problems are a simple misunderstanding between people. (insert michael jackson's "heal the world"...) another thing i've always been confused about at the bar: why is it the more boobs you're showing, the stronger your drink tends to be?
chick peas.. neither a chick nor a pea... discuss
einstein in denver
we have a bright one on our hands... stuff like this amazes me. Ahh, the stupidity of some of the human race. read about the
nailgun.
cocaine utopia
i love calling people to ask them for handouts. you can tell a lot about a company, or a person for that matter, when they take your call. how many hoops do you have to jump through or questions do you need to answer in order for them to give you something. this is why i love cashwise grocery store. doesn't matter who you are just as long as you say you're from the university and are hosting an event.... "what's your name so i can put it on the gift certificate that will be waiting for you at the service counter". SWEET!
today is the last day before classes start again... perfect day to be in the office. just sitting, rocking out to some of my favorite music, praying to god that no one ruins the utopia of the circumstances by knocking on the office door or calling.
putting the finishing touches on some ice fishing stuff. come to find out that no one from the MC is going to be there... specifically OKed the weekend with them a month ago, and they go and plan a "team retreat"...this is bollocks! your presence will truely be missed.
FUN FACT OF THE DAY: spray WD-40 on surfaces to prevent the snorting of cocaine... (ie: wd-40 and cocaine form some sort of reaction that makes the cocaine unuseable) apparently this is how bars in England stopped their patrons from snorting off of toilet seats... sneaky bastards. jen, take note. together we'll have to remember to line the seats beforehand if we ever go to the UK together. (c;
holy shit
just looked at the weather and its officially ABOVE
freezing... not sure how this happened and despite my defensiveness of the cold winters up north, am secretly jumping for joy
the bell jar
i find it quite comforting to have a favorite book and every once and a while pick up that book. to my surprise, every time i open the pages to the bell jar, i find something new ... something sylvia put into those pages that i hadn't discovered last time i read through it. ... a good book, hot chocolate and a pb&j on a snowy afternoon.... ahh.
broken and boring
its currently 23f...why i feel the need to give a weather update as often as i do is because, quite frankly, weather in MN, especially in the winter time, runs your life. and so i'm very happy to announce that yesterday was the last day of well over a week of subzero temps. WOOHOO!
i broke my car yesterday. somehow the release cord for my hood snapped and now i can't pop my hood to add the everleaking tranny fluid, or even windshield wiper fluid ... thank god i got my oil changed recently. but, man, that really sucks.
i've just come to the realization that i'm a pretty boring person, and have pity on anyone who's taken the time to read any of my entries.. i have an opinion about almost anything...and a smart-assed comment to go with that opinion, but other than that .. i'm boring. sorry for that
annoyed
i've just recently become very annoyed with the world. it upsets me that so many people can figure out that loving one another for the differences that we have is an amazing thing to grow from, yet so many are consumed with hatred. i suppose that's why AIESEC is in my life, but why can't people get their crap together and figure this out more quickly?
i think i think too much
i'm so consumed with "timing" my life perfectly. and i'm not so sure why this is. i mean, i'm 21 years old, have plenty of time for everything, right. i think that this fear comes from my raising. by the time she was my age, my mom was married, had two kids, was widdowed and remarried. and for the longest time, my mom and grandma were convinced that i was going to carry on the tradition they had started of having a daughter when you're 20 years old. thank god that didn't go past my birth. but because this tradition hasn't continued, i feel sorta like i'm never going to fulfil myself (don't get me wrong...i don't want children now or in the near future). but having young parents has been one of the greatest things in my life, or so i think. however, I DON'T EVER WANT TO HAVE THE SAME LIFE AS MY PARENTS.
i really need to convince myself that life is day to day. having future visions are OK, but not necessarily how things work.
the real question clogging my head lately is "is he calling because we're friends, or is there something else there that we both subconciously feel, hear, see?" but in the same sense, my future visions aren't wanting to be altered by anyone and i don't want to alter someone else's dreams/future. i want to live my own life and don't want anyone screwing with it... that's the way i think all people should live, but as i'm saying that i know that i don't always hold true to that.
i'm pretty much a walking oxymoron. shit.
find your soulmate in 7 days
right... 'cuz we ALL know that that's possible. I hate those emails.
I quit. Done! I smoked my last cigarette EVER last night. I'm not a smoker, except when I drink and after smoking over a half pack in 4 hours last night and some random guy handing me his full box of TicTacs, I'm through. I woke up with an extreme headache and my mouth won't quit tasting of it. And, I find it pretty unattractive when others do it, but somehow justify my own grossness.
Dreampt about AIESEC last night... two rather attractive @ DJs and one Black Eyed Peas song. This org follows me everywhere... think its a sign?
blech
i'm bored... i'm sick of reading. my butt hurts from sitting, 17 people have passed through the store since 9.30 this morn, its 6pm and i'm here for another 2 hours. anyone have any fun things to do by yourself... i have a computer/internet, a phone, access to coffee and a book. i suppose i need more of an imagination. by the way, way to be blogging, aiesecers...i've read all of your entries and comments, every last one of them today.
ICE FISHING
WHO HASN'T SIGNED UP YET?... AND WHY NOT?
ice fishing in minnesota is becoming one of the hottest reception events in the nation. so why haven't YOU signed up yet? "i don't have any money" say some.. its FREE, so there goes that one. "Minnesota's cold" say others. this IS true, however, the only time i spent outside at ice fishing last year was walking from my car to the cabin. there is the option of bundling up and drilling a hole through 2 feet of ice and sticking a line in, or roughing each other up playing snow-football, though. PLUS: we townies know how to Par-Teh! if you ask anyone that came last year, they'll tell you that this reception event ROCKED their world and left them hungry for more. an added bonus? SWAMPWATER the greenish-brown beverage that keeps you warm in all ways possible. if you have questions or comments, please let me know. but if you're ready to admit that you want to be part of this townie culture, contact HOLLY @ holly_brekken@hotmail.com.
merry weekend to all
puke orange floral curtains and a brick wall
snow is blowing on the (currently) -3F day in the MN. i am looking at the poor souls that used to be me. through an arch in the wall, i am able to stare from my place of employment (a cute little gift shop) into the coffee shoppe that i once adored, but came to resent when they fired me because i was leaving for an internship with my beloved AIESEC in NYC (for a month). looking back, how i was screwed over with pay and respect. how can a person give 2 years, unpaid overtime, much training of other employees, constant maintenance and simply be dropped like a bad habbit for wanting to fulfill some dreams? heartless bastards, perhaps...i think it may be fear, though. i used to bash starbucks hardcore... not anymore. i've grown to love an respect the consistency of the company that spans the globe...something that not even 4 meeting grounds locations in central minnesota could master.
"what do i care how much it may storm?.. i've got your love to keep me warm." gotta love a little louie armstrong and ella fitzgerald. a whole 3 people have wondered into the store in the last three hours. so i'm just chillin, reading others' blogs sipping some coffee and eating the best cereal known to man, honey bunches of oats!
its currently below zero, high expected to be 2 above and low of about -17. man, am i going to miss this when i finally leave.
NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS:
- figure out what my life path will be in the next year.
- don't ever drink so much that i break down in tears while talking to the organizational consultant (again)
- get a passport (hold the gasping) and use it this year
- if in the country, head to NYC for the Jim & Rickesh farewell cruise in NY harbor.
- pay off all outstanding debt and create a re-investment strategy that will ensure continual connie profitability.
- apply to any/all jobs that spark my fancy..even a little bit
- keep in touch with those special people in my life that i consider friends.
yep, that should do, for now.
snow really does sparkle like diamonds.. and is very calming to watch fall. i always enjoy being with people during their first snowfall... there's something magical and innocent about their faces and ability to snap back into child mode.
i miss aiesec already...its only been a week since i got back from conference. both of my best st. cloud aiesec buddies are out of town right now...makes things kinda lonely. roommates can only hear so much about aiesec before they want to beat you up.
ooo...a customer!
this has officially been a production of (as mazzy would say) "dun du-duh da.... Captain Random"
concrete or maleable, townie or city-slicker
Life is such an exciting thing and if you think about it, everyone starts on an even playing field. We are given one life to do with what we wish. Given, for all the downfalls I've had so far, I've been VERY blessed. Parents have been great and very supportive, siblings...don't know what I'd do without a single one of them, family in general is amazing. And then somehow, I scored some of the most incredible people in the world as my friends. Not quite sure how this worked out because just like everyone else in the world, I know I don't always deserve the positiveness of my life.
Just over a week ago, I returned home from one of the most energizing and motivational events of my life so far. AIESEC has been a staple in my life for two years now and I can not explain what a void there would be if Holly Ann would not have invited me to attend an information session one winter afternoon in 02. I feel that to her, I owe much, simply for presenting me with an opportunity.
So, the AIESEC conference that I just came back from, lets get back to that. It truely amazes me that 200+ people can join together with 1 national staff, 1 kick ass DJ, and 3 consultants and be as productive as we were in January 2005. Other than LTM in November of04, I have never gotten so little sleep and felt like I accomplished so much. And 199 of my best friends were bucking up and living the "work hard, play hard" motto with me.
Since I've been back, I have been wrestling with what's going to come next in my life. I have this semester all set academically, but I have to decide what will be reality AIESECly. And then what? I feel like I have so much to give the world, but if I don't "time" everything correctly, my dreams won't ever come true. So, do I finish school? Do I go abroad this summer? Do I apply for positions as they come available? If I finish school, when do I finish school?...August?.. December?.. as I'm working?.. after a job or two? Do I take into account what my family wants for me, or do I live my life for myself? I've been truely struggling with decisions that are coming sooner than later.
I suppose I've already answered the question of who to live for. This is MY life to do with what I wish. Its such a hard thing to wrap my brain around though... and the decisions are laying out a new path to travel down for a while. Concreteness is scary, but so is maleability.
I'm a townie...I sometimes wonder why I want to be a city-slicker.
first one
so, this is my first official Blog post EVER...woohoo for me, but i'm at work,so i gotta go
